Mama Don’t Preach

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My mom is corrupt.

For about a decade now, my ermats has worked for the Department of Social Welfare and Development, that’s DSWD for Christ’s sake. They are the ones who respond to those filthy government-hating squatters who, like puppies, come wagging their tails when storms flood their homes.

People hate you when you work for the devi—I mean, President or her associates. Everyone, including close friends, begin to lose trust, thinking that you are indeed working for The Devil. The typecast kills—erm, or maybe not.

The thing is, every time a typhoon hits Cavite, gazillions of goods (i.e. rice, noodles, canned stuff, etc.) need to be packed and delivered to poor people who are either homeless or drowning in accumulated urine, I mean rainwater. An oversupply of those goods always occurs. Since my mom is a Social Worker, she’s one of the few who does the packaging and delivery. And of course, she gets to bring home the extra sacks (yes, sackS—as in plural) of rice, noodles and canned sardines. [Not to mention the bond papers, yellow pads, and ball pens she brings home everyday.]

Even the simplest people bend towards the wicked. And if I were God, corruption would be something I’d hinder. Of course and then some…

God complex, I have none. [Hakhak, I love this wordplay.] But if I could play Almighty for a day these are the things I would do:

1. Destroy the Ateneo—In my wildest dreams, I imagine myself inside the Ateneo campus, incognito, carrying an explosive and anytime, ready for a suicide bombing delight. Hakhak. It’s a joke. [Or is it?] Well the point is, education is so overrated. If you graduated from college, does it secure vantage in life? No, it doesn’t.

That is why I’d like to make education inexistent, or superexistent (if such exists). Meaning, everyone will have fair knowledge. No one knows more than the other. Thus, no one can brag to be a genius.

In short, I will Disprove the Genius.

Hakhak.

2. Annihilate Banco de Oro—Money, money, everywhere, but no money to spend.

Those coins and paper bills are objects I love and loathe at the same time. I love it when I have them, hate it when I’m broke—just like everyone else. So, if I had the power to do so, I would erase money from the depleting face of the earth.

No money=No crimes.

3. Make Piggy Banks From Politicians—I’d love to see corrupt people as piggy banks. Just imagine, they’re face down, naked, a hole in their backs serve as a coin slot. Just like a piggy bank. Why? I don’t know. Just for fun maybe.

4. Dispatch Animal Abusers—Out of all people, I hate animal abusers the most.

I do not have a pet but I am into equality. It’s cheesy, but I believe that every living creature has a right to live. I’m not vegan but I am planning to be one.

It would be my profound pleasure to view these unforgivable sinners inside cages and/or being chased by lions in a field.

And last but not the least…

5. Burn Bullies at Stakes—If there was a part of my life that I want to forget, that would be high school.

Whoever said that high school is the best part of life hasn’t gone to TNCHS. It’s like hell, squared!

Hakhak.

I am a train wreck right now. My self-confidence is currently at the zero level. My social life, too, is inexistent. And I owe it all to those effin’ bullies.

I’ll put them at separate stakes and slowly burn them, until it reaches their faces. As they burn, their skins melt. Large boils form in their faces. They‘re screaming for help. No one answers. There are people. The people just stare at them. Laughing. Enjoying the scene. Then laughing again. Alas, their bodies rescind. Their hearts stop beating. They’re dead. They’re ashes anyway, so nobody cares. Enough of the morbidity, it gives me chills [Eeeeh.].

Hakhak.

In real life, I’m not this radical. I ‘m just stoked from my math assignment. I wish I was god so that math would not exist at all. Hey wait, that’s the point of this post.

May we be superheroes or average humanoids, we have dreamed of being superior, of having more, of taking control of everything. We have indeed been infected by the god complex once or twice in our lives. But we live in non-fiction. Everything’s real. Every day is a new challenge, a new chance to say “I wish I was God.”

But the truth is, we can all be Almighty. We can’t just wait for Morgan Freeman to pop-up and say “I’m God, and guess what, I’m giving you my powers.” Move now.

Be GOOD. Be GOD.

Hakhak.

This is my entry to the Blog Challenge 05: Almighty For A Day

XXXxx